Hopefully this week’s blog won’t crash and delete. Squarespace as a host is really rather rubbish lately, which is very annoying.
Anyway, let’s give it a go.
What have I been up to? Well it’s the build up to my favourite/worst time of year.
I’m a complex soul. I love the build up to Christmas, I love the decorations, the sequins, the sparkle, I love creating table scapes and making door wreaths. And then it gets closer to Christmas and I start having a meltdown.
I think I just get overwhelmed. I put so much effort into not letting it consume me, that I become consumed by the effort of not getting consumed.
It’s utterly ridiculous, I know it, I think it too. But it happens every year.
No idea when it started. but I know it got worse when I became a mum, it definitely got much much worse after Sam had his cancer diagnosis, and I had mine. But in fairness I was already showing signs of it as a teenager.
I needed everyone to be well, and home safely Christmas Eve before I felt I could breathe. It was/is and is a physical pressure on my chest and a dark looming presence in everything I do. I suppose it was/is anxiety, but I didn’t know it back then.
It’s very weird. But I think I’m so aware of it now, it’s just part of my Christmas tradition. Some people wrap present together and sing Christmas songs, and some people phone round all their friends to check they’re still alive and can’t settle until the list is complete. ;)
So I make the most of the bits I do enjoy, and do as much as that as possible.
So far I have put up all the decorations - Inside, outside. The She Shed decs - in side and outside.
If you sit still long enough you will become part of my Christmas decor too.
Is it too early for decorations? Obviously not for me, seeing as I’ve put them up. You - do - you. ;)
Saturday Chris and I were heading into London for a late lunch and then over to Kew Gardens for the Christmas lights. Ben joined us for the lunch part, then he headed off to meet friends and we went to Kew.
Jumper from Ralph Lauren, Trousers from Primark, Boots from DKNY, Bag from Chloe.
Before lunch, whilst we waited for Ben to arrive, we popped to Fortnums so I could spend some gift vouchers a friend bought us. Chris did wonder what he might spend his half of the vouchers on, but I very kindly let his use them to buy a share in the Huntsnan picnic hamper for four. ;) I’m all heart!!
Then it was off to Chuntney Mary for a big brunch.
There will be people who have a stoma and feel negatively about it. There will be people who don’t have a stoma and are negative about those who do.
But there will always be people, like me, who bloody love their stoma!!
It’s days like this that cement that for me. Off out in London for a lovely meal. Then off to Kew to wander round Kew Gardens to look at the lights.
Before my diagnosis, while I was incredibly symptomatic, this would have been a mere dream. In fact it wouldn’t have even been that. I had no capacity for dreaming as I was trapped in my local area.
Staying local, playing it safe. Not venturing too far from a toilet.
The lights at Kew are a real treat. They are spectacular. We went last year too.
It’s definitely one to visit if you’ve never been.
Some of the light displays are so magical I weep, and get all overcome.
I know, I’m a right weirdo, sometimes I can be so dead inside, and then others I’m blubbing at bulbs!
******
I’m not very arts and crafty. The only time of year I get to do anything remotely craft like is Christmas wreath making.
I went to a few sessions a few years running, and learnt how to do it. And now I buy all the stuff in and make my own.
I invite my friends round and let them make one too, as a Christmas gift for them. That’s nice of me isn’t it, I make them make it themselves…and they think I’m nice for it, when really, it’s a bit lazy on my part. But let’s not tell them that.
I attempted my first hand tied bouquet for attaching to the wooden sleigh. I saw one similar on Pinterest and wanted to give it a whirl. It isn’t great, but it’s a first go and it was cold working on it in the garage so it will have to do. :)
I left Chris in charge of buying our new outside decorations. Never leave that man in charge of outside Christmas decorations! Hahaha
We now have a family of deer, and a 5’ wreath! Which was so heavy he’s had to put in a massive bolt into the wall and strung it up on a chain that wouldn’t look out of place in Jurassic Park, holding down a T. rex.
And I couldn’t be happier! :)
It looks amazing out there. There’re a few more things to come. Which in very excited about.
While he did those, I worked on the inside decorations.
The living room tree is done. I bought these beautiful Nutcracker ballet inspired mice last year. My expectation is they will now become heirlooms, for the rest of the family to enjoy for the rest of time…
Once I’m dead and gone of course - T&Cs apply. :)
And then the best room in the house was such a joy to create…
Last Christmas, Chris and I found ourselves at a loose end, he’s off for two weeks over the Christmas period, and we had no guests coming over in the bit between Christmas and New Year’s Eve. It was a bit of a low ebb.
Anyway, he decided to perk us up, and booked us tickets to go and see the Christmas display inside Anglesey Abbey in Cambridge.
It was absolutely sensational!! Honestly I can’t recommend it enough, if you get a chance to go this year, take it!
It made me feel so nostalgic, so peaceful, and yearning for Christmas past.
Their decorations are as they would have been in the 50s and 60s (I appreciate I wasn’t born then but people kept their decorations for longer back then, so they were the baubles of my childhood too).
I came home from there and set about a mission to recreate the Abby’s display in my house for this year.
I told my mum about the Abbey, and she very kindly gifted me the decorations from her first married Christmas in 1969. And Chris very kindly donated, if not knowingly, his credit card so I could buy vintage baubles from EBay.
…And so Christmas 1969 (an imagined Christmas that I wasn’t yet born for) was my mood-board for this Christmas (yes, I mood board my tree displays, I don’t just throw this shit together you know)
I googled and sourced original vintage pieces. And my heart couldn’t be happier with what I have created.
Original lights, original baubles, original decorations. All vintage and absolutely bloody gorgeous!
I love white lights on Christmas trees, and I have them in the living room, but the coloured lights and gaudy baubles on the dining room tree are giving me such a high.
I love love love it!
Oh and if you were ever wondering exactly how bonkers I am…well, even though I have a stinking cold, I washed and blow dried my hair, did full make up and put a ball gown on, just to get the right essence of Christmas of yesteryear.
I mood boarded Jayne Mansfield, and any other glamorous ladies of yesteryear.
The dining room tree…
My mum gifted me her surviving tree decorations from the year she got married to my dad in 1969.
I bought vintage pieces from Etsy and EBay.
And I created my re-imagining of Christmas 1969
Separated at birth… hahaha
Pinterest is a feast for the eyes, full of incredible retro Christmas inspiration. I’ve enjoyed searching for the looks I was after as much as I enjoyed putting it together.
I also bought a ‘correct’ sized tin of Quality Street…none of that half portion, plastic tub offerings in every supermarket since September!
I have two table scapes on the ho at the moment. I have the one in the dining room in the house, and one in the She Shed, because I love being out there.