(*First and foremost I want to say that I’m not saying how hard done by we were, I’m not saying it was a huge problem. I very much appreciate that Chris and I live a very happy existence. We are incredibly fortunate and blessed).
It was our 29th wedding anniversary on Valentine’s Day, so Chris booked us a spa retreat break away. It was very thoughtful of him, we love a bit of pampering.
Plus he wanted to make up for the fact that our previous week’s spa break went a little tits up due to the lack of stoma bags debacle. Not that he had anything to make up for, but he’s just a really good person.
This particular health farm is part of a very famous group, and I would have said - a very prestigious one. We’ve been to a few of their other locations, albeit 15 plus years ago.
So we never gave it a thought as to whether this one was worth going to. It didn’t cross our minds to be honest. We didn’t Google, didn’t look at the reviews (although, that wouldn’t have helped much as a lot of the reviews were glowing reports - which blows my mind).
As we walked in it looked like a combination of Crossroads motel (the 80s tv show), a roadside Travel Lodge/Premier Inn, and the private hospital where I was diagnosed with cancer (which was built in the same era).
If we thought the front entrance was dated, we were wrong (because apparently that part has had a multi million pound revamp).
As we moved further into the hotel it became clear that we’d checked into what I can only described as something resembling a dementia/elderly care facility.
It gave me the ick, I was trying to hide this fact because it cost Chris a lot of money.
I could strongly smell disinfectant, although Chris said he couldn’t, but I did. Whether I was imagining it or not we’ll never know. It could have been psychosomatic, because of the hospital vibes.
Our room was underwhelming, the windows were blown, so they were a bit fogged up. The bathroom looked like something out of The Golden Girls, and the black marks on the ceiling, looked very much like black mould, it was not what I expected (I didn’t have any testing equipment at hand, so I don’t know for sure but it certainly looked like it).
The telephone and television were from the arc. (The tv had an integral dvd player! If only I had dug out our collection of dvds from the loft, we could have stayed for a movie marathon).
We went off for our first treatments at the spa. We thought we’d take a look at the pool on the way and maybe go for a swim after our massages.
We didn’t get that far, it looked uncared for, a lot of the windows were blown, so they have that frosted, opaque look to them.
Very much like what you’d have in a municipal pool owned by the local council. Not what I’d expect from a very expensive hotel group.
This was not shaping up to be the restful trip away. You can’t relax and unwind in an uncared for environment.
The treatments were average, in so much as I’ve had better and I’ve had worse, but availability was good so I guess that’s something. And the staff were incredibly friendly (but it’s the midlands, so that comes with the territory - literally. The further north you go in England the friendlier the people get).
The lawn was beautifully manicured, no easy feat in winter, so that’s a plus point for them.
But a nice lawn and friendly people isn’t always enough, or rather it definitely isn’t.
We went to dinner in the dining room, in what I can only describe as similar to an out of season, run down seaside resort hotel, or again the dementia care home analogy.
We laughed a lot, mainly because we laugh at the absurdities of life most of the time anyway. And this particular situation was laugh or cry, so we chose laughter.
We were both so surprised, it was bitterly disappointing but not the end of the world. Chris said that we’d have the massage we’d booked for the morning, then head home, over a day early, not even stopping for the room for the next night, or lunch and dinner we’d pre paid for.
Everything was so dated, and at points, dirty and or rotten. We have a very nice home, so going away and spending hard earned money on accommodation should always be better than what you already have.
We were pissing ourselves laughing when I looked up at breakfast Chris had porridge dribbling down his chin… it really added to the dementia care home vibe.
I’ve very rarely seen him spill food, that’s usually my role, but it was so beautifully timed. 😂
We cut our losses after breakfast, had our massages and went to check out.
It wasn’t just the decor that was dated, the whole ethos was too, with only low fat milks and nut and seed ‘milks’ available at breakfast. Low fat yogurt etc. It was like the nutritionist in charge of the food had read an article in Top Santé magazine back in the day, and that’s where it stuck.
We now know that full fat whole milk is less processed, better for gut health, can protect against bowel cancer, better for nutrients, and keeps you fuller longer etc etc.
I did chuckle when I found out that alcohol is served all day now. It used to be just one glass with dinner in the evening. But apparently last year they changed the policy…of all the times to give up on nearly a hundred year old ethos.
We have learned more and more about the harms of alcohol, with absolutely no benefits.
It’s directly linked to 7 different cancers, plus the obvious risk of alcohol related illnesses.
I have no problem with people wanting to drink. I don’t want to, but what other people choose to do is none of my business ~ as long as everyone is aware of the dangers. In the same way as we know that smoking causes harm. People still choose to smoke, but it’s an informed decision.
The US surgeon general was recently saying he wants warnings on alcohol much like cigarette packaging.
People will always choose to do things that are harmful to us, it seems to be deeply ingrained in human nature. We saw people in their “health farm” dressing gowns sitting in their cars smoking, which we thought that was hilarious.
You do you, but I’d expect more from a health farm. Especially more information about the benefits of the foods laid out in the buffet.
We were at reception checking out, and the lady was trying to encourage us to stay. I said “honestly we can't, It's like we've been at Shady Pines retirement home, and put simply, our home is nicer”.
There was nothing that could be done to help - well, not strictly true, they could have constantly kept on top of the maintenance and invested in upgrades throughout the years rather than it feeling like we were in a time capsule of the 80s and 90s, even down to the furniture.
We ran from there so fast, and drove gladly, but sadly home.
The most galling part was we could have gone to Soho Farmhouse again for the same cost, and we know we absolutely love it there.
Still, we live and learn.
Putting a doily on a circa 1991 table does not give it the update you think it would.
I hadn’t actually noticed, it was my friend Kim who pointed it out. I thought this was just a manky old water feature…but there are actually fish in there!! No plants, just a few cables dangling in it…just as fish love it! 🫣
This shopping area was bizarre, but it was highly in keeping with the hospital or care home vibe…
Personally I love a random outdoor indoor wall…
I expected to find Blanche, Rose, Dorothy and Sophia hanging out somewhere around here…
I appreciated the blue plastic camping cup…you know how clumsy us old timers are!
…And I love the game “is it or isn’t it black mould”. I find that incredibly relaxing.
I’m not quite sure what the thinking was behind this ill fitting, mock Parisian street scene was…
Seeing as it doesn’t provide either security for the stock in the shops nor camouflage.
The restaurant was exactly what I was expecting…from a Travel Lodge…
This was not a cheap weekend away.
And this was not what we had expected.
I heard Kim Cattrall on a podcast say that she refuses to spend a minute of her time doing anything she’s not enjoying.
Life is so sacred, so precious and so fleeting, that it would be madness to spend it doing anything unless it brings you joy. And this was definitely in that category.
We headed home, we spent the rest of the day with the budgies, who at least were happy our weekend away was ruined, as they got to see us, and we binge watched Amandaland (would recommend, it’s fun and funny).
And then came Sunday, which was very much a very happy day, because Chris booked us in to our favourite restaurant, which more than made up for what felt like work experience for our golden years. 😬😂
*I loved our little wedding day 29 years ago. It cost less than £1000 in total, including honeymoon.
Our wedding reception was in Chris’s mum and dad’s living room.
And my mum made the bridesmaids dresses and cake.
It was small and perfectly formed and more importantly - it’s lasted.
I had just bought this suit (below) in Debenhams, in the Christmas sale (1995) I was planning to wear it for our wedding on Valentine’s Day 96.
But my mum was pretty sure that I’d regret not wearing a dress for our big day, so her and my dad took me shopping the week before the wedding and bought me a dress off the peg in Monsoon.
I’m glad they did.
I loved the suit, but the dress was beautiful.
I was 22 when we got married. We didn’t have any budget really…the shoes I wore on our wedding day were the shoes Chris’s previous fiancé had bought for their wedding (waste not want not - I was ahead of the game on up cycling 🫣😬😂).
It still fits like a glove…a really really very snug, 3 sizes too small glove, but a glove nonetheless 😂
Boy am I glad that I’ve always had classic taste.
The suit and the dress I wore on our day are still wearable now (If I was a few sizes smaller obvs).
When I compare them to some of the dresses of the time, I’m glad I’m a simple gal of simple means.
I love classic styling. I think it lasts if you andd in some more contemporary features, and if the quality is good it should last a lifetime.
The shirt below is about 16 years old. But it’s still very wearable, I know this to be true, because I wore it last Thursday. :)
Shirt from Aquascutumn, Jeans and shoes from M&S.
Friday day time’s number was again from the back catalog that is my wardrobe.
Long tunic jumper from Jigsaw, Top from M&S, Leggings from Next, Bag and Boots from Dior
I was selling the jumper below on my Vinted account, but I lost some weight and it fits perfectly again.
Jumper from Micheal Kors, Coated Jeans from Holland Cooper, Boots from Dior.
…Classic classy clothes, and a love that lasts a life time.
Sunday more than made up for the lost time at the nasty hotel.
First stop was to Intimissimi to swap over some cashmere blend tops Chris had bought as a little something to open on our wedding anniversary. I have looked at them countless times over the last few months, but never took the plunge and bought any.
He cut through all the time wasting and bought four of them for me.
He bought medium, which was very sweet of him, but I am most definitely a larger lady.
Top and Jeans from M&S, Shoes from Dior, Coat from Max Mara
I would very much like to be in India, and hopefully we will next year for our 30th wedding anniversary.
But if we can’t be in India then Chutney Mary, in St James London is the very next best choice.
They made up for the first part of the weekend there.
After dinner we had a walk to walk off the meal.
I prefer lunch dates to dinner ones to be honest. I’m old (not quite care home old yet), but I like my food to digest before bed.
So we went for a walk around town.
I ran out of my favourite perfume, and LV have for reasons unknown decided to discontinue it. So we waited for a sales assistant to walk us through some alternatives…I’ve never been so grateful to have to wait, because although these shoes are beautiful they absolutely killed my feet. It won’t stop me wearing them, but a rest was needed.
I haven’t found a replacement perfume yet. But I will continue my search.
Having now bought the Intimissimi tops I would highly recommend the investment.
They are so cosy and warm, it’s like wearing a cloud.
They are going to come in very handy for my trip to Athens on Friday.
I hadn’t ever thought about Greece getting chilly before, I suppose I just think of Greece as a holiday destination.
Well, colour me surprised, it gets cold! Really cold. Actually it’s going to be colder there than London.
Cashmere base layer advised and ready to go.
…Notice the dip in temperature coincides perfectly with my visit.
I’m there Friday Saturday Sunday. But that’s not going to affect me in my thermals 🥰😂
Wishing you a very happy week ahead, make it count, and remember to smile. ♥️
I’d like to take a moment to send my condolences to the family of darling Claire, aka FairyRuss on instagram.
She was an absolute angel, the biggest most gorgeous heart, so generous and kind and supportive.
Even through what she was going through she would take time out of her day to brighten other people’s lives. I very much enjoyed getting to know her via her posts and chatting via private messages.
She was adored by so many, and will be sadly missed.
Rest well sweet fairy. 🧚🏼
There is no one reason for the rise in bowel cancer in the under 50s. There is no blame on those people who have been diagnosed.
But I do want to try and avoid any further problems. So I read all the articles I see about what might help and what might harm.
Not obsessively, not to the exclusion of fun, but sensible positive steps to try and see if it can help.
