Mum very kindly edited this for me from her knee replacement recovery bed. Many thanks mum get well soon xx
I’m trying to balance my new attraction to black dresses with equal parts colourful choices.
Black is fabulous, it’s classy, sexy, but oh so safe. I’m not ready to coast into Italian pensioner-hood yet.
Yes, I’m a grandma, I have been since I was 45, I just don’t necessarily want to cast myself as the withered old crone in the movie of my life.
So having found myself with far more black dresses in my wardrobe of late, I’ve made the conscious decision to never wear one more than two days in a row.
Dress from The White Company, Shoes from Dior.
Black Friday meant it was colourful Saturday. Saturday’s dress was also chosen for the day itself.
Dress from Nobody’s Child, Shoes from Hermes, Bag from Dior.
We’d had this weekend in London planned for a while. Ben was running a 10k race on the Sunday, which started at 9.45. We decided to make a weekend of it and booked a hotel for the Saturday night.
Then we decided to add a little spa day aspect in.
As much as I hated the transition from being a parent on active duty (ie 0-18 years), and retired from active service (18-forever), I have very much enjoyed the freedom of choice, and freedom of movement. I loved being a stay at home mum, I loved bringing my children up. It’s fair to say I didn’t cope too well when they left home within 18 months of each other (Aged 21 and 20).
Sam moved out first, to far away Hampshire, then Ben bought a flat in January 2020, and then a few weeks later the world shit it’s pants and lockdowns became a reality. So we couldn’t make the most of the freedom of having no children at home.
It wasn’t easy at all, I was bereft. I missed them so much. It wasn’t until October 2021 when we felt confident and comfortable to fly again, that we could finally get to experience life as a carefree couple.
I’ve not got any advice for others going through empty nest syndrome, apart from to say that do as much as you can, whenever you can, and slowly start a new chapter together.
For Chris and I it was super weird. I met Chris when I was 20, engaged at 21, married at 22, had Sam at 23, pregnant with Ben at 24. So really we’d never been solely a couple for very long. We went from couple to family of four very quickly.
Starting to be a couple again after 20 odd years of being a four takes some adjustment, but I feel like we’ve aced it now.
Since October 2021 we’ve been on over 30 flights, and countless adventures. And I can safely say, I bloody love the freedom now! I love the ability to instantly pack a bag and go anywhere we want.
So Saturday, Chris booked us into Thai Square Spa in Northumberland Avenue in London, and booked a night in the Club Quarters hotel, literally across the road from it.
It’s a very basic, cheap and cheerful hotel, in the most perfect location for the spa, and for watching Ben on his run on the Sunday.
The treatments at Thai Square are fantastic! We had the two and a half hour couples indulgence treatment.
Five star! Would recommend!
The reason I chose this green and black floral dress was because I thought it was highly likely I’d get covered in oil, and it wouldn’t stain, or rather, wouldn’t show on this fabric.
Although, my assumption was that we’d have the massage, then go to the hotel, get our pyjamas on and chill out. What I had failed to comprehend (because I don’t (can’t) do maths and numbers, thanks to dyscalculia), is that two and a half hours on from midday is only 2.30 in the afternoon! Hahahahaha, which even for us is probably a bit too early to go to bed.
The treatments there are amazing. The steam room first was really good. The full body massage was fantastic.
If you have a stoma and feel a bit unsure about having massages, try starting off with something that doesn’t require you to lay on your front. An Indian head massage, or leg and foot. Just something delightful and relaxing but without the pressure of laying on your bag.
This one happened to be a full body massage, which meant I was laying on my front for nearly an hour. This can present problems, I can feel a little concerned that it might leak. I decided not to eat breakfast or lunch prior to the massage. That way I felt it gave me a better chance of not having too much output during the session.
I had no problem at all, and I had no random wind issues. I have always found the worst part, in fact, the only downside to having a stoma, is the fact I can’t control my wind expulsion. I don’t even get much, if any, warning most of the time.
And because I have a very low down colostomy, air coming out of me sounds the same as air coming out of anyone with a bumhole. Only they might get some advanced warning, and if they’re really lucky, the chance to hold it until a suitable time.
I get no warning, and there is zero ability to hold onto it. Which I find incredibly difficult to cope with. I’m a lady, yeah, you heard me right, I’m a prim and proper lady!
Okay I swear like a sailor on shore leave, but farts? Absolutely not.
But what choice is there? Stay home and never venture outside and make sure no one accidentally hears me fart, or think to myself **** it! Life’s too short to care.
I’m in the don’t care camp, but not fully, emotionally and physically. It’s more the case of I do care, I care very deeply, but I care about living life to the full more. So it’s a risk I’m willing to take, even though I’m fearful of embarrassment.
Spa session complete, with no embarrassing moments. We popped over to the hotel for a shower, then got the Tube over to Harrods for lunch. I craved the salad we’d had last week in Harrods Social, a little hidden gem of a restaurant in the basement.
We were a bit spaced out. But we had a lovely time.
I decided I wanted a white bag to go with some new white shoes Chris had bought me. I had planned on buying it with the money. I’ve been saving up from selling all the clothes that no longer fit me on Vinted.
I tried a fair few different brands in Harrods only to find that as it turns out…I never see limitations when Chris is buying me things…but I bloody well do when I’m buying me things. ;)
I’d say mainly the cost. In fact pretty much mostly the cost, God, things are expensive aren’t they!
But added to that, no one is doing pure white bags at the moment. They are all a tone off, like a milky cream, rather than white white. And I needed white.
Then I remembered that I’d seen an advert for a pre loved boutique in Knightsbridge, who happened to have a bag in the pattern I’d wanted 20 years ago, but definitely wasn’t something we could afford back then.
So we headed over to the store. And what a little Aladdin’s cave it was too!
A bag I’d wanted way back when, in a colour way they no longer make or sell…in a price range I could actually afford. Life has a way of working out for the best. It just took 20 years and pre loved things to become desirable.
I’m so pleased with her! She’s a beauty!
And it’s my first ever pre owned investment in adulthood. I used to dress from jumble sales and charity shops as a child a lot. But I’d gone right off the idea as an adult…apart from table scaping treasures at car boot sales of course.
Anyway, I was able to go into the shop and see it in the flesh. Check it for damage, and smells.
It’s in fabulous condition! (Well it was until the green dress I wore with it the next day leached colour onto it, honestly I could cry! (But obviously I won’t as it’s just a bag, it’s not the end of the world, close, but not quite. Perspective is vital in life. Bags in any sense are not a problem).
I’m very happy that selling old things, which no longer fit me has paid for something new. Definitely recommend clearing out the old, and in with the…even older in this case. ;)
We didn’t have lunch until quite late, which meant we really didn’t fancy any dinner. So we bought a selection of cakes in Harrods food hall, and went back to the hotel to eat them in bed. I know, so rock and roll, but I’d give this particular day and ten out of ten rating!
Then Sunday was Ben’s 10 kilometre run. And we were staying a 30 second walk from where we could cheer him on.
Race ready!! :)
Dress from Jigsaw, Bag from LV 20 years ago, Shoes from Hermes 4 days ago.
Ben ran a very respectable time, and his friend Taylor ran a very very good time, and actually achieved a personal best, so it was a great day all round.
Ben and Taylor had a little cheer leading squad in tow, which is the closest I’m going to ever come to being in a running race.
They’re doing another London run in October, so Chris and I might well repeat our weekend schedule for the next one too.
Ben And Tay with their cheerleaders. Although in fairness Taylor was so fast we didn’t actually see him on the route.
Chris and I, Ben’s friend Max and his girlfriend, Alice (thank you for the photos), and Ben’s girlfriend Erin, all cheered them on from the comfort of the sidelines.
Erin’s friend/flatmate, Kathryn wasn’t able to come out to support Ben on his run, but she enhanced the photo from the morning to be in it, which I’m more than happy to share, as she’s made me look ******* sensational! :)
Look how amazing I’d look if I went “full Essex”!
:)
We went to a pub to get drinks, and to congratulate the boys on their runs.
Then Chris and I headed off for lunch over in Chelsea.
We love Bluebird, the restaurant on Kings Road. It’s a timeless classic, much like myself.
Food eaten, we then headed over to The Victoria and Albert museum for the Diva exhibition.
This was a fun packed, full weekend.
This is only possible because I had a stoma bag as part of my cure for cancer. And this is never something I take for granted.
Which is why facing the fear of random outbursts of wind anxiety is so important, and worth it.
Life is so tragically short for some people who deserve to live long and happy lives. Therefore I can’t ever forget how lucky I am. And make the most of every single moment.
Diva sadly wasn’t as good as I expected or hoped for. It’s nice enough and interesting to see some of the incredible woman in music’s outfits. But it is small. And strangely, some incredible women and their outfits aren’t in there. Which I found very odd.
The ones that are there are beautiful works of art. And most of those women are minuscule…no wonder they get the Diva reputation, I’d imagine they extremely hangrey! ;)
Keep well, big hugs. Xx