You know when someone has one of those bright ideas and everyone’s all in?
Well my weekend was one of those bright ideas come to fruition!
Not mine I hasten to add, definitely not mine!
Over Christmas Ben had a few mates over, they were reminiscing about the time we hired a holiday cottage in Norfolk, I agree, it was a great weekend away.
Well Chris sloped off out the room to try and book it as a surprise, sadly though that lovely house was no longer available. But what he did come up with was a 12 birth boat on the Norfolk Broads (a large body of water made up of open water and canals).
Everyone was all up for the idea, it was booked and the rest as they say is history. So we set off Friday morning for our long weekend away.
There was only 9 of us in the end, which actually was a blessing, sleeps 12, my a*** it does! Hahahahaha
Chris and I, Ben & Kaitlyn and five of Ben’s friends set off for our watery adventure.
Well, the company was as ever, wonderful, they’re great people. Ben has been blessed with an incredible group of friends. They have supported him through a great deal.
They’re just good people and great fun to be with.
Jumper from Next, Jeans from New Look, Boots from Dubarry.
I bought the jeans, I thought I’d give them a go having never bought any from New Look before. They’re comfy enough, well as comfortable as jeans can be. I didn’t have any leaks, but I rather wisely bought the size up and undid the zip a lot of the time.
That’s the beauty of being with friends.
Chunky knitwear isn’t always a great look on already bulky bodies. But I really loved this jumper, it’s so cosy and snuggly I’m willing to forgive its unflattering nature.
We arrived in sunny Wroxham in Norfolk to pick up our cruiser…my God it was a monster, thank god we went in winter, we’d have never been able to park it come summer.
After our 20 minute instructions we were off on the high seas, well Broads!
It’s one of the biggest boats I’ve seen on the Broads, it has a decent sized kitchen, 3 permanent bedrooms (one of which is en suite (more on that later)), 2 other showers and toilets combined (again, more on that later), and 2 living rooms.
It was spacious until you put 9 adults, with luggage in it, then it becomes very cosy, I can’t imagine having 12 people in there. :o
Whether or not I’m made for camping (boating/camping same same) is not the point, my personal preferences do not take anything away from the scenery and the feeling of calm.
The views are spectacular. Norfolk is one of England’s most beautiful counties. The beaches are hard to beat with their endless sands and skies, but the Broads are just as beautiful.
It was so peaceful, helped by the fact we hired a caravan on water in winter no doubt.
Our happy little band of brothers and sisters.
I did have to wonder what others thought of our little party. Did they think Chris and I had had septuplets? Did they think we had brought away disadvantaged, troubled teens from an inner city area?
Did anyone even notice us at all, probably more likely. :)
The fact they are neither teens nor disadvantaged aside, we must have looked an odd group. :)
We pulled into our first stop of the trip. Parked our giant boat on the bank and experienced proper British hospitality at its finest!
We walked into the pub and the woman behind the bar said “how many of you?”
I replied, with a smile “nine”
She then hurrumphed loudly and said in a rather irritated tone “oh great, I thought I was going to have a quiet night”
hahahahaha hahahahaha beautiful!! Beeeeauti-ful!
It did make me laugh, that is the standard customer service from Brits. ;)
So average meals (but very large portions) were consumed. And then back to the boat for our first night of “sleep”.
First point, I don’t sleep well particularly anyway, plus I was fretting because I usually get very sea sick.
I didn’t feel sick at all the entire time on board as it turned out, which has got to be a first, so that was good.
However I didn’t like waking up with the curtains and windows dripping with condensation.
It was cold, cold but sunny, was I suppose the absolute best we could hope for. I’m not a total idiot. I appreciate that if you go on holiday, on water in winter you really, at the very least should expect it to be cold, I’m just not a fan.
Unfortunately I wasn’t keen on the toilet arrangement either. The toilet and shower and sink are combined in one unit, so you’re showering over the loo, all very odd.
I had my shower, I had the privilege of stepping straight into our bedroom which was a bonus.
I got myself all dried then realised I had to step back into the bathroom to change my bag, which at this point still had 2 inches of water in the shower tray.
Never have I felt more grim than standing in water changing my bag. It would appear that I’m not someone that embraces change or camping come to that. Hahahahaha.
I know, you’re shocked, I come across as such an easy going, chilled out, go with the flow type of gal usually huh? ;)
You’d think I would be ok with camping, I was brought up on it, it’s in my blood, I didn’t stay in a hotel till I was 19.
We used to camp when our children were little too, but my tolerance levels have clearly changed over the years. It is fair to say I am no longer a happy camper. :)
Once the ordeal of getting washed, bag changed and dressed was over (too much you say! You weren’t there, you don’t know man, you weren’t there!!! Hahahahaha) I was ready for the day ahead.
It turns out that feeling damp and chilly makes me eat for Britain, big shock! I was like The Very Hungry Caterpillar, chomping through everything and anything I could find.
I did embrace boat life as best I could. I took a turn at the wheel, which was fun.
I fed the local wildlife and took in my surroundings, also fun. I ate about 25 hot cross buns, which was definitely fun!
Jumper from Ralph Lauren, leggings from Next.
I needed warmth, comfort and to be able to poo in my clothes…I think some of the others came close to that but without the privilege of a bag! Hahahahaha
The boating bit is great fun. Big fan, huge fan of tootling along the water.
The personal hygiene bit is not as much fun.
If you’re ever in doubt about whether having a stoma is a positive or not let me assure you that it 100% it really is!
Let me paint you a picture.
The boat toilet is basically a camping toilet, you have to pump the handle quite hard just to flush toilet paper… soooooo…
I have never been more grateful for my colostomy bag.
Watching my fellow crew members sweating and fidgeting whilst fighting the urge to poo, I was reminded that there are definitely occasions that I come out on top. And stifling boat poos is absolutely one of them.
There I was merrily stuffing more food into my mouth whilst peristalsis pushed it out the other end, neatly collected and contained in a bag. Bliss, shear and utter bliss.
It’s 10 years since I was diagnosed with cancer but I can still remember that dreaded need a poo now! feeling, it’s not something I miss.
Apart from the toilet situation (for the others) and the shower situation (for all of us) it was a fantastic trip, it’s so peaceful and relaxing.
These are a wonderful group of people. I love them dearly.
We moored up for our second night near a pub called The Dog Inn (yes, really), we found as we disembarked our vessel (I’ve got all the lingo) that we had been parked? moored, a 1 minute walk from a very nice, clean, block of toilets the previous day.
That went down well with the others, I can tell you. hahahahaha.
We had a lovely meal at The Dog Inn, homemade, good portions and a smiley welcome. What more could you ask for?
There are some up sides to holidaying on the Broads in winter; There’s very few other people out on the water.
Plus the pubs have enough room to seat you, especially seeing as there were 9 of us.
I would go again, but I think I would do what a friend of mine does. Her and her friends hire a holiday home (on dry land) and hire a day boat for the daytimes.
That does sound far more agreeable.
Top from Gap, Leggings from Topshop, Coat from Belstaff, Boots from Barbour.
It definitely pays off to make life easy for yourself, I packed soft, comfy clothes. Are they stylish? Nope, but they are comfortable and warm.
Our Sunday lunch time stop came up trumps, we had a roast dinner in river side pub, not exceptional by any means but perfectly edible food, I had the sticky toffee pudding for dessert, which credit where it’s due was unexpectedly delicious.
Then outside the pub there was a wooden shed of slot machines. Chris and the others were delighted! It’s not really my cup of tea, but again in fairness to the place the 2p machine was the best I’ve played on with its ‘quick fire’ action. I very much enjoyed the motorcycle racing too, I won, so I would I suppose. ;)
For the most part it was a wonderful weekend away, there are things I’d do differently, but I have at least attempted to broaden my horizons, and push my comfort zone.
Turns out I don’t like to too much. ;)
I am lucky I never even contemplated The Duke of Edinburgh award scheme in my youth. I feel this trip was almost it anyway so I might apply for the certificate off the back of it! ;)
The plan had been to stay Sunday night too and drop the boat back Monday morning, but by Sunday evening everyone had pretty much had enough of boat life.
We packed up and left the boat in the marina and raced home to our delightful showers and delicious beds.
In addition to last weeks blog of planes. trains and automobiles - can you go boating with a stoma? Yes, of course you can!!
Can I ? Noooooo! :)
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I heard about an amazing artist locally from my friend Michelle and it really did intrigue me.
I have never had a painting commissioned before, I mean who has?
But I decided I would get one painted for our wedding anniversary.
I knew exactly which photo I wanted painted too!
It’s my favourite photo of Zak and I.
For now it’s nice to look at and admire, and when I’m long dead, it’s a nice heirloom for the Antiques Roadshow. Hahahahaha.
It’s a beautiful picture of him when he was new to the world, but also, the shape he’s pulled into reminds me of both my sons at a similar age.
So for me it’s 3 memories in one.
I’m so pleased with how it’s turned out. She really is rather talented.
Painting by Alice Masters
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Don’t let my lack of enthusiasm put you off, the Broads are delightful, I will be going back. I will just hire a day boat and enjoy the comfort of my own bed at home.