Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you….I hadn’t calculated my readership in a fair while and thought I’d take a look the other day. I was stunned to find I’d had over 90 thousand reads (just to be clear, this is reads we’re talking about, that does not equate to readers, but still, I’m over the moon and blown away).
I know full well there are at least 40 odd people I’ve helped because they have written to me over the 3 years of my blogging to say that I have, and you might think that that’s not that many but honestly I didn’t ever think anyone but close family and a few loyal friends would ever read what I have to say.
So the fact that I can help just one person is incredible.
Sometimes it just takes a gentle nudge from someone that’s been there to make us feel bolder about ourselves. And that’s why I write this blog, I am your gentle nudge. xx
We should feel confident enough to stand on a beach, full bag on show if we want!
*Not that everyone wants to do that of course, but you should at least feel you could if you wanted to, that there is nothing stopping you other than personal preference, rather than a negative emotional block.
We shouldn’t give any power to self deprecation or self stigmatisation. There’s enough negativity in the world without us adding it to ourselves.
I may well not be physically whole any more but emotionally I am whole in abundance.
I appreciate I have an easier time than a lot of people.
Firstly, I have a colostomy which is just very easy to handle, my output for the most part is firm and far easier to deal with.
And secondly I have an incredibly supportive husband that makes me feel like a queen - a goddess - every day, even on the days when I don’t feel it. He lifts me, and always has done.
Was it luck to choose such a good one? Was it fate? I can’t see that it was wise judgment as I had made terrible life choices up to that point. ;)
Maybe the Universe was just so sick of my dreadful, stonkingly awful choices it felt enough was enough already and sent Chris to me? Who knows?
How ever our paths crossed I’m glad they did.
This photo was taken in February in India this year.
The fact that I am body positive enough to wear a bikini in public (bagged up and at the time a 45 year old, grandma to be) is some thing to celebrate I suppose, Yay me. But that’s not how or why I do it, I wear a bikini because it feels comfortable, natural, it feels right.
I’ve nothing to prove and no one to prove it to, I wear what makes me happy…and what makes me tanned most. ;)
I hope more than anything anyone reading this will be thinking along the same lines ~ you do you.
We’re here for such a preciously short time that feeling confident and comfortable in our skin has to be made a priority of self care, and that’s not just a bagged life issue.
Also, it’s worth noting that the only reason I was confident enough to fly to India to start with is solely because I have a colostomy bag attached.
There are so many more possibilities out there for me now I don’t have to worry about s***ing myself in public.
Yes, it’s true, leaks can occur with a bag, but not to be too graphic ~ they occurred without it too!
So to sum up, thank you for reading the ramblings of my mind, thank you if you’ve read one blog or 100 (have I even written 100? No idea, maths is not my forte) I appreciate every single one. xxx
I had a pretty good week last week, in fairness I like all my weeks.
I decided to try my hand at ‘at home’ - home made Christmas door wreath making. I usually go to a wonderful class for it but sadly it’s not running this year so I went on Amazon and bought all the bits.
I am the least artistic, crafty person. My mum however can turn her hand to everything and anything, she made my bridesmaids dresses and wedding cake, she can literally turn her hand to anything, she knits, sews, can do wood work, anything! It must have skipped a generation as I can only make a mess. Hahahahaha
Anyway it turns out I can make something and I loved doing it too.
I’m in a wreath making frenzy now! I appreciate its slightly niche, but homes in American shows often have year round themed wreaths, maybe I’ll start the trend here too. :)
Then on Friday I went to the Colchester Zoo with my friend Kim and her twin girls. It was such a great visit. The animals were out in force.
On such a chilly day I assumed there’d be loads of no shows but we were incredibly lucky. Particularly as the tiger cubs were out and really playful.
I made some errors of judgement (told you, I simply can’t help myself). I pushed the double pram a bit, I shouldn’t have, I picked Bel up a bit, I shouldn’t have, I bent down quite a lot, yep, you guessed it, I shouldn’t havvvvveee!!
I have a hernia, it enjoys none of the above.
By the time I left for home I knew I was in a bit of strife. By the time I was walking round Sainsbury’s, getting dinner, I was doubled up in pain I kind of knew I’d made a terrible mistake.
Off I hobbled home for a lay down, a gentle massage of my hernia and a hot water bottle on my belly for the trapped wind that ensues if I upset said hernia.
It took some time to calm down. And it can leave a pretty rotten bruised feeling in its wake. I call it the hernia hangover.
I don’t want another operation, so I live with the hernia and try to manage it, as you can see I’m doing a marvellous job! Hahahahaha
Saturday morning Chris and I set off at the crack of dawn…literally.
Hernia hangover or not, I’m not missing out on a shopping trip!
Jumper from Tory Burch, Skirt from Silk Fred, Boots from Kurt Geiger, Bag from Goyard, Coat from Sainsbury’s.
I decided a skirt would be best to allow free flow of output and therefore comfort.
We headed of to Bicester Village in Oxford, it’s a couple of hours away but well worth the drive…unless of course you have something in mind.
I saw a bag in Fendi there earlier in the year, I didn’t get it at the time, I couldn’t afford it at the time but I really loved it.
Anyway I went back with the hope it would still be there and that I would have it for Christmas if it was…it wasn’t! Hahahahaha
Back to the drawing board.
Actually, it turned out rather fortuitous that it wasn’t there. I’d have bought it without looking round at everything else, and that would have been foolish as I found some right little treasures.
Coat £50 from Sainsbury’s, Scarf from Gucci
We found this little treasure there. Our Sam lives in Hampshire but it’s only about 45 minutes from Bicester village, and as we had some stuff to hand over to him he met us there for a coffee first thing.
We had such a great day. A morning hug with Sam, a rare treat. And a successful day’s shopping.
Chris bought me the most beautiful coat (obviously as with all things beauty is in the eye of the beholder, I love it, others won’t, and that’s ok as I wasn’t planning on loaning it out hahahahaha) from Burberry.
He also bought me a beautiful bag from Chloé. I have been very spoilt (and rightly so hahahahaha), I am really very lucky. I did say he treats my like a queen. Christmas comes but once a year and all that, he’s being very strict and has taken my goodies off me so they can be wrapped for Christmas Day. That said I’m hoping to sneak the coat out for a day out next week. ;)
With Christmas spirit in mind I was pointed in the direction of the ‘Get your belly out’ Christmas fundraiser by Christine who runs OstomyConnection and Kindred Box in America.
She will often be contacted by Brits asking if she takes donations of unused bags. Which she does, but the postage to America is colossal and a tad off putting.
She pointed out that the U.K. based charity ‘Get your belly out’ was collecting unused (I keep emphasising unused, it’s pretty obvious but you never know hahahahaha) for countries in Europe that don’t have our incredible NHS and that people with stomas can live in bag poverty if they don’t have the right insurance cover or indeed no insurance cover at all.
As a Brit I have never experienced not having bags and all of my stoma products provided for free, delivered to my door for free.
The NHS has many failings sadly but it is still a huge privilege for those that just got lucky and happened to have been born/live here.
We don’t have bag poverty like they can do in America and the rest of the world. I can’t imagine the horror of not having a single stoma bag to use and have to resort to carrier bags duct taped on.
This would lead to lost work days or even to lost jobs, simply because you don’t get your bags for free, delivered to your door, by a very cheery courier.
That is heartbreaking. I and my fellow Brits are very lucky.
I can safely say I wouldn’t be as positive and as perky as I am about stoma owning if I had nothing to catch all my waste in.
You can donate in two ways, either a cash donation to help with the cost of sending their haul to where it’s vitally needed or post any surplus supplies you might have to the address above.
I had a fair few bags that I have ordered over the years that simply didn’t suit me so I posted my package off yesterday.
It cost about £3.50 second class but that will definitely get there in time for the 30th November closing date.
Or if you’re in the USA you could donate to Kindred Box, find it on Facebook or Instagram.
Christine is one of my stoma heroes who’s putting stoma owning to good use.
She not only runs Kindred box, which supplies much needed ostomy supplies to those with no or poor insurance but she also runs OstomyConnection which is a great online publication for ostomites world wide.
*Little tip I heard from a friend in America, send off for free samples to stoma supply companies, they might keep you going for a while.