So here we are Lockdown Day ? ~ I have no idea….
I don’t know what the day is, or what the date is. All I know is I’m sitting at home waiting for the storm to blow over.
The news makes me more than a little anxious. So it might be an idea to release myself from that hell at the very least and stop looking.
Chris and I pretty much went into lockdown before it was requested of us. I’m germ phobic on a normal day let alone at a time when the NHS might not be able to offer you a bed or respirator (overly dramatic? Possibly but I’m determined to never find out).
The only time I’ve been out is for food, or GP appointment, and the only time we’ve seen people is when Ben and Kaitlyn came to collect some bikes. They walked round from their flat. All 2 metres distancing guidance was adhered to and the bikes were throughly disinfected and left on the drive way for them.
I remind myself daily there is no right way or wrong way to feel about lockdown.
If you’re sad, that’s ok, if you’re enjoying it, great that’s ok too! There are no rules on how to feel.
Don’t be too hard on yourself for not using the time better by learning 3 languages and cordon bleu cookery.
I’m coping fairly well in isolation from the world. For the most part this is my normal.
The only thing that’s different is the shops aren’t open and Chris is doing a jigsaw puzzle on the dining room table.
I’m pretty anxious about leaving my property. I was hyperventilating last week at the thought of going to my doctors for my B12 shot. I managed with a lot of anti bac and hoping for the best, which is also how I got round Tesco to pick up some bread, milk and fruit too.
Both experiences were perfectly fine. I needn’t have got myself all worked up.
There are terrible moments of course, I’m not immune to the cruelty the virus has showered upon us.
Those numbers you see on the news, aren’t just statistics, they are real people, people’s beloved mums, dads, brothers and sisters and children.
I find all of that very hard to process, it’s so desperately sad.
The hardest part for me personally is just after we FaceTime with Zak. That moment when we hang up my heart breaks and I feel so low. That’s the bit that’s the hardest.
During FaceTime of course is pure joy. He’s so funny and wild and wonderful.
He’s quite the character, he runs round with his arms in the air which is funny to watch, yelling at full volume. Not a care in the world. Oh to be 1 during this weird time.
There are blessings though, I have the best cell mate in the world, I have enough house work to keep me occupied indoors and a garden to get fresh air and sunshine outside.
I have cut my grass 5 times since official lockdown, there is barely any grass left but I find mowing strangely relaxing. So bald grass it is then!
I have had very little food waste too, which is good, I’m quite proud of myself for that, add to that I’m in the spirit of the blitz with my make do and mending. I had some stale hot cross buns and bread sitting on the side so I made a delicious bread pudding. Mine’s a bit different to the normal recipe as I hate squashy things like sultanas and raisins (hot cross buns being the exception to that rule).
My bread pudding is chock full of dates and walnuts.
It was delicious, note the word was…
It was really was delicious…it only lasted 2 days!!!! Bloody hell, that should have lasted a family of four a week, but isolation is a very hungry place.
I am currently 5lbs weight gain into eating my feelings through lockdown. I shall be very lucky to come out of it just obese, rather than morbidly obese.
I have the 4 main meals of the day (breakfast, brunch, lunch, dinner) plus snack time interspersed. I had hoped my mind set would become healthier, fitter, determined to come out of this thinner and gorgeous.
Like a butterfly emerging from its chrysalis…but no, looks like I’m going to come out of it looking like Waynetta Slob!! (Some of you may need to Google that).
Other than gorging, I’m doing ok. I make the most of what I have.
The weather was amazing last week, so I donned my shorts and enjoyed the sun, preferring to believe I was on some gorgeous beach somewhere.
Rather than sitting on the front porch overlooking what is essentially a car park. Hahahahaha.
Being happy is all about reframing a scene and a positive mindset.
We all would rather be doing something else right now. None of us ever saw this on the radar for 2020. I really thought it was going to be a great year. So many plans, so many trips.
I saw a great little meme on Instagram - we are not Stuck at home we are Safe at home. Long may that last.
But this is the year we have so let’s make the most of it.
I can’t say I’m going to be learning a new skill or language with the gift of time l’ve been given. I don’t even know my native language that well, just ask my mum, she has to edit this blog as grammar passed me by at school.
I can’t say I’ll be passing on any chain letters that arrive in my inbox either, sorry about that, I really do wish humanity well and all but my inbox is where chains come to die. :)
No, my time will be spent weeding and mowing for the most part. I have sown seeds and potatoes (we’re not going to be self sufficient or anything but will deffo have something to eat should this go on for longer than expected).
This is my Vitamin D outfit. I have high factor suncream on my face but I’ve left parts of my body exposed for some of the good D.
D is needed for a strong immune system, so I’m all in for some safe sunning.
But also I thought it was a good idea to put some real clothes on, just to check I can still fit in them.
I saw someone on Twitter say their boyfriend has been wearing pj’s and jogging bottoms and started calling his normal old clothes his “hard” clothes.
It’s true.
I love my soft clothes and my no bra and no make up life.
(a small caveat to that, I am wearing a bra in these photos, I’m 46 the girls aren’t that perky anymore!).
Who knew that my happy place in all this would be cutting the grass. My grass is shocking too, patchy and full of holes and yet I feel so calm here mowing it away to nubs.
Having seen what was going on in Italy and Spain I knew we were heading towards a mandatory lockdown so I stocked up on flowers at a local garden centre beforehand, which means my garden will be beautiful…there’ll be no one to actually see it of course but at least Chris and I will.
I have decided to make Easter extra special. Yes, it will be just the two of us, which is very unusual.
We love a get together at Easter. But as we’re going to be short on guests I decided to make it a fun and happy looking occasion.
Is it weird to put a Christmas tree up and decorate it with eggs? Yes, I imagine so. But it’s no weirder than a virus sweeping across the world trying to pick people off at random.
Although apparently virologist have been expecting an event like this for years. I just never thought it would happen, not after SARS and MERS were so very well contained.
Easter decor from Neptune Colchester & TK Maxx
Chris is doing quite well out of lockdown, I bought Sam, Milly, Ben, Kaitlyn and Zak a couple of Easter eggs each months ago, they were on special offer just after Christmas. :)
Well I can’t hand them over now, even though Ben was here picking up the bikes I couldn’t hand over Easter eggs. You can’t really disinfect them like you can a bike.
So I’ve put money in their bank accounts to buy themselves eggs and Chris is merrily chomping through the 8 eggs I previously bought.
He’s a very happy bunny right now. Ironically I hadn’t actually bought him an egg at all. Just goes to show you God does work in mysterious ways. Hahahahaha.
Two more things to be grateful for at this time, firstly I have a food intolerance to chocolate, so I know I won’t be tempted to eat the eggs. And secondly I’m glad I gave up drinking over 3 years ago because that would not look pretty in lockdown.
If proof was needed that I have in some senses mellowed during lockdown…tolerating a ‘puzzle’ ( I spit this word with disgust!) on my dining room table.
Surely if you want a nice picture you just pop down to Athena and buy a poster! Showing my age now, I think Athena hasn’t existed in years. :)
The fact remains I see no point in puzzles…not when you could be out cutting the grass. Hahahahaha
*************************************************
I really hope you are safe, well and coping ok too.
Wishing you all a safe journey through this. xx
******************************************
Chris and I and Matt and Kim are meant to be in Barcelona right now.
A little sightseeing, eating and generally wandering round aimlessly.
I’ve owned a property in Spain for 20 odd years but I haven’t been to many other places there.
We drove 4 hours away to Madrid once when the weather was bad at our house and had a lovely little holiday within a holiday.
And although we have driven past Barcelona, when we drove home from our house in Spain to our house in England we’ve never been to visit.
I was looking very much forward to the trip. Firstly life is always fun with Matt & Kim. And secondly I was looking forward to seeing the majestic architecture…oh who am I kidding…I was looking forward to churros & chopitos really! hahahahaha
I had some outfits picked out to wear.
I bought this little number in white and black.
Chris wasn’t keen as it’s very oversized and baggy. Not my usual style. But I loved the idea of wearing something, short and baggy.
I saw an ad for it on a social media influencer I follow’s Instagram. Lorna Luxe, lovely lady, a million followers but still responds to messages. She’s got a great figure so there’s no point in trying to emulate that look, but I followed the link for this and they had it on plus size girls too and I thought well why the devil not!
I tried it on without cycling shorts under in and the minute I walked into the garden it blew up. That’s not for me thanks very much, no one wants to see my massive arse at the best of times but especially not while it’s untanned and sizeable from lockdown snacks!
Besides, I’m probably a bit old for such a short mini dress but the shorts underneath make it a long top rather than a short dress. It’s all about changing one’s perspective.
It’s probably not actually that short a dress really but its billowy nature makes it prone to blowing up.
I felt too exposed without the shorts on.
My friend Leonie has been singing the praises of cycling shorts under dresses for years, I’ve always poo poo-ed the idea but I have to say I felt so much more confident with them on, great for keeping my bag and bum covered and don’t forget I’m a sufferer of severe chub rub (my inner thighs are prone to blistering they rub together so much!). So it’s a win win.
Confident and blister free!
Dress from ASOS, shoes from Manolo Blahnik
ASOS DESIGN grandad collar button through mini smock dress with tie sleeve
£30.00
Ideal for just hanging round the house in, which is what I shall be doing in it for the time being.